lesson learned.

ive been blessed this last week. even though its been tough.

the lord has reminded me that he is still there and that he wants what is best for me.

he reminded me that i need to rely on him more

that i need to do things on my own sometimes to grow

and that his timing is perfect

i was offered a good opportunity this week that i wasn't sure that i wanted. i wanted a change, but i wasnt sure if this was the best way to make that change. i spent time praying about it and talking to close friends and family on whether or not i should take it. i had no impressions either way on what to do. it was stressful and created a lot of anxiety for me.

this was one of those situations where both answers were good. and the lord didnt have an answer for me. it was a situation where i just had to have faith and take a step forward. and wait for him to approve my decision or let me know it wasnt what was best for me. so thats what i did.

i took a step.

and moved forward with what i needed to do. i was proud of myself for doing so. all on my own.

until a few days later i got a phone call telling me that they had changed their mind and that i was no longer given this opportunity. it was a total and complete shock. i had spent all this time working on coming to a decision and here i was pacing in the parking lot being told i couldnt have it anymore.

it was a total and complete surprise. but i take comfort in knowing that for some reason thats not what my heavenly father wanted me to do. he was proud of me for making a decision but he has something else planned for me.

"When we explain a problem and a proposed solution, sometimes He answers yes, sometimes no. Often He withholds an answer, not for lack of concern, but because He loves us—perfectly. He wants us to apply truths He has given us. For us to grow, we need to trust our ability to make correct decisions. We need to do what we feel is right. In time, He will answer. He will not fail us." --Richard G. Scott

"If, in trust, we begin something which is not right, He will let us know before we have gone too far." -- Richard G. Scott

so here i am. at square one again. but only after learning a very important lesson and being stretched a little further.