a house vs. a home

i just got home from a wonderful trip to oregon for thanksgiving. i got to spend the day with my bestest friend zannie and her husband p today. it was so nice to be able to go to church with them and then to take a nap after having a snack. but coming home has really helped me understand something i already knew a little better. the importance of a house vs a home.

after spending the day with them i came home to my apartment and this is what it was like;

i walked inside to see my roommate at the kitchen sink.

she didnt acknowledge me. i said hi and she finally turned around.

but didnt respond.

i hauled my luggage through the kitchen and living room making sure not to step on all the crap on the floor from one of her projects.

i sat in my room for a while and eventually left to make food. i found myself crying as i was standing in the kitchen in a place that i felt totally uncomfortable in. and only after hurting my wrist did i realize here i was alone and feeling icky becuase of the place that i live. all this time i was alone and still managed to feel so gross when usually being alone is a relief.

im so grateful that i was able to go home this week. it always leaves me feeling grounded. things that are important become more clear to me when they may have been a little foggy before. and i am reminded of how important a home is after being in such a good environment with my family. heres what i think makes a house a home:

1. the gospel

2. a loving relationship with my husband and kids.

i really want to make sure that these things are in my home. i am so grateful for parents who have taught me the ways of the gospel and who have continualy had the spirit in our home. i love my parents. i am so grateful for their example and loving relationship. it really gives me something to strive for.

im grateful for the spirit and that the lord has specified that our homes should be a holy place. it may be tough now but i have an awesome example of what i want my home to be like in the future.

blehhh.....

i dont know what to do right now.

i feel like writing but i havent allowed myself to just have time to sit and think things through. and i dont feel all creative like i want to in order to blog.

i dont want to go to bed but i dont want to watch tv or do anything else. why do i do this?

.....

maybe i'll just go to bed.

i was looking through pictures on my computer...i kind of miss my short hair....thoughts?

maybe its just my tan and thin face....i should start working out and bleaching my teeth. hah!

eh i found a re-run of the office. that'll keep me busy for a half hour.

my happy things today

1. i didnt have to work today. (which means i got to catch up on my disney channel shows)

2. i got to see baby monson. i got to feed him and hold him and take adorable pictures of him.

3. i downloaded an app where i have to take care of a kitty. i may or may not already be addicted. it will just have to do for now til i can get a real one. haha.

4. i spent the evening at barnes and noble with josh. i read 'the giving tree' to him. (he hadn't ever read it!)

5. we ate pretzel bites with nacho cheese facing each other on a bench in the mall.

6. i bought a new wallflower for my room. they were on sale! spiced cider is the perfect holiday scent. bath and body works just makes me so excited.

7. i bought a new ring!

it looks like this...but is purple in the middle.....i pretty much love it

8. i ended the evening with fresh chocolate chip cookies and the office.

:D

my duck tape

i bought a roll of duct tape with my mom at target when i was in idaho a few months ago and i have yet to find a good use for it....until today!

i pulled out my go-to headband this morning to pull back my greasy bangs so i could go snap a few pictures really early this morning. only to find out it had snapped in my drawer of junk.

my thought process went like this;

i should tape it

but that would look ugly and i wouldnt want to wear it

thatd be cool if i had cute tape

....wait i have cute tape!

so it began....i took this:

and made this:

yay!! im so excited i may just wear it to work tonight.

in other exciting news i bought some new boots. i had decided i wanted some boots with a heel and in my process of looking for things at ross for my photoshoot i found these amazing brown shoes for only 16 bucks. i couldnt pass it up and have worn them almost every day since i got them. i know this is dorky...but i took this picture for my sisters to see how stylin their older sister can be. (they tend to be more in touch with whats cute these days)

you didnt know i was a model did you?

i went out and took some pictures of timp this morning. it was absolutely beautiful with the sun rising and all these clouds around the snow covered mountain. if it wasnt so honkin cold i may have gone out and taken a few more. i plan on doing that tomorrow. but for now:

all these leaves that have fallen make me so happy. it is my favorite time of the season when EVERY tree has changed colors and they have even started to fall. the best thing is when there is a small pile under the tree on the green grass where they have all settled.

its my favorite to drive behind a car on a leaf filled road to see them all flitter up and down as it passes over them. so fun! i just dont want it all to leave. but i'm beginning to say goodbye to them and hello to the snow......

i heart babies

i struggle because i dont ever know how to separate my journal and my blog. sorry but i just dont feel like writing my deepest thoughts and desires to the whole world on the internet but i do like the creative vent it is for me that my journal just doesnt give me.

i went for a run the other day.

ya i know....its been forever. but i was feeling sluggish and gross and decided getting my heart pumping would help. it was in the middle of the day which is even more weird for me because that means i have to shower again. but oh man what a perfect fall day for a run (ok jog/speed walk because im so out of shape right now)!

i just love living in a neighborhood because i get to interact with people who arent students. as i turned around at the top of the hill a lady cutting her bushes (who i admit i got jealous of for getting to do yard work. i seriously felt like asking her to help just because i thought it would be fun) said "good for you, i would have walked up the hill and ran down it." then a few seconds later i got asked for directions to the mtc. the guy was foreign and hardly understood english and even though it was the slightest act of service it left me feeling good.

jogging gives me time to think about......everything. i think so many things ran through my mind in those short 30 min. but the cool thing is it always seems so positive. i was thinking of things i want to do to be better and things that get me all excited. maybe i should stop being so fat and do it more often....ok before the snow comes.

i got to hold a baby this week.

what an amazing feeling! i had warm fuzzies for the next few days. i cant even imagine if it was my own baby that i had been carrying for the last 9 months. it will be amazing.

i get to take more pictures of him tomorrow. i spent my day walking through ross and tj maxx looking for cute fabrics and things to put him in. this is my first 'photoshoot' so i'm nervous but so excited. it feels good to have something i HAVE to be creative about. wish me luck.

here is a picture of him from the hospital....

hes so tiny!!

ps. a bird pooped on me today! in my hair.....sick. i heard *splat* and a *tweet* and then said 'i thiiiink i just got pooped on' sure enough it was true. this is the second time! both in my hair even. sick.